There's intimacy. Then there's sex.

I’m back from a long July 4th weekend in New York. We had a great time seeing shows and soaking up the energy of the city.

While I was away, South Carolina Governor Mark Sandford’s public meltdown continued only to be overrun by Michael Jackson’s death and Sarah Palin’s ... well ... what was that?

There was one piece of the Sandford story that caught my eye, probably caught yours too.

Heaping injury on insult, he first divulged a history of liaisons with other women, then, as if it somehow made it all o.k., pleaded that he'd never actually “crossed the line” with any of them. Incredible.

He meant sexual intimacy, of course. But he surely knows he crossed an infinitely more important line than sexuality intimacy. He thoughtlessly squandered his emotional intimacy.

Anyone who’s been married or in a committed relationship knows the subtle interaction between sexual intimacy and emotional intimacy. You can have sex without coming close to touching each other. And you don’t have to be in a relationship long to notice:
- The days when you’re emotionally available to each other and the ones when you’re not.
- The times you choose to hang on to your emotional distance -- for any number of reasons.
- How emotional distance can become a habit, and the impact if you let it continue too long.

Start playing fast and loose with emotional intimacy, overlooking it in your primary relationship or scattering it around like Sandford and ... well ... scattering your seed becomes a secondary issue.